weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
