Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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