One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
