I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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