i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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