I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Boobs are out for the taking
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
