Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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