Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
