love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
it's like heaven, but drunker
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Randomize
