Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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