the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
