He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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