just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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