there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
