My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
