Where is the hickey?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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