I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
