so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
