I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
