so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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