So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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