Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
