yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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