If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Randomize
