I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
