; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
