i don't like sucking hair
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
