About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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