He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
