Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
