I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
