I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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