turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Randomize
