a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
