he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
