Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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