Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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