Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
