Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
