I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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