Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
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