Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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