when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
