I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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