when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
