Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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