I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
i believe in u and ur pee
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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