census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
