ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
