So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
