i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize